Bloody Acquaintance
by Kitsune Slave
Summary: Gaaraxoc Gaaraoc A girl with a downhill life. A cold, blooded monster. Or is he? Perhaps Gaara is the only person who can make her feel like she has a purpose in this life. And he finds her with her arm covered in blood. But why? Read to find out. Review
1. The Meeting

Late at night, I had a thought... it was of Gaara. What if he found someone kinda like him? Minus the demon, of course. I think, so long as they have a good reason, he'd accept them no matter what. Of course, it's going to be a love story, the perfect mix of morbid and romantic. My character, Deserai (Des-er-ay), is basically a manifestation of my feelings if I were to be doing if I were her. But I am not in her situation. This is just what I would do and how I would think if I was.

No flames because not everyone reacts the same in the same situation. You can message me via e-mail or if you wanna talk about your experiences but please don't contact me just to yell at me. I will be sorry but I will fight back because these are my feelings and I will stick with them no matter who is against me. I work hard to try to understand other people's pain and I learn from others experiences. Thanks for listening to my banter and I hope you enjoy this morbid romance.

Bloody Acquaintance

Chapter 1: The Meeting

Sometimes, even the most popular people have to reflect upon their lives. Mine sucks. My parents didn't want children after they had them for 10 years so they abandoned my twin brother, Ritsu, and I. We live in a run-down apartment in Suna because I support both of us. I have two jobs-- one at a weapons shop that goes from 9 A.M. to 5 P.M., the other waitressing at a localbar from 7 P.M. to 12 A.M. Both jobs are on the other side of town so I get home at about 2 in the morning. My brother is a genin who's trying to become a chunin. He doesn't work in his spare time.

I'm lonely for someone besides him. I actually am planning on having kids. But who would ever want to have them with someone like me? I'm not populare, too skinny, a workaholic (not by choice), and I'm ugly. So many of my old friends have told me that so I've learned to accept it. They always said that the only way I'd get laid is if Sabaku No Gaara went to sleep and the Sukaku used his body to rape me. Totally not funny but with my luck, very probable. I've never met him or even seen him. Thus, my chances have increased dramatically.

But that's not the worst part of my life. I'm a cutter. During the nights of the full moon, after work, I go into the park on my way home and start running razor blades across my wrists. I knew that it was frowned upon by everyone but those people didn't know anything about true pain. I just wanted it to go away! But I would never commit suicide. My brother was the only thing that kept me alive. I guess the reason I want kidds is so I have more reasons to live. However, I won't stop cutting. Not even for Ritsu.

There was just something about watching my blood, my pain in liquid form, running down my arm, staining my skin crimson, that relaxed me. It made me feel almost... alive. Every other day of the month, the one's without the full moon, had me down. When I wasn't cutting, my body felt numb. Useless.

Something good did come out of cutting, though. It was during the first night of the full moon. In the park where I did my monthly "ritual." I met him.

Blood-red hair, short and messy. Cold sea green eyes. A red tattoo of the kanji "love." My arm was covered in blood and he seemed to come out of the sand itself.

"Why are you here?" a harsh voice asked softly, unemotionally.

My head shot up and my cerulean eyes locked against his sea green. His were outlined in black rings that could only be there due to lack of sleep. I couldn't breathe. My "ritual" had been seen by another and I coudl just hear his next words, asking me why I would do this to myself. Condescending words.

Caught with my cut-up wrists and my razor blad in hand, I simply shrugged. "Relieving my pain..."

He "hn"ed and sat next to me as he looked at the moon. I watched him carefully. Why wasn't he telling me off? Sure, we didnt' know eachother but did that really matter? People liked to believe they were right so if he didn't believe in cutting, he would have told her as much.

"Why are you staring at me?" the boy asked, clearly ticked off.

"Well, I... why aren't you yelling at me? Calling me stupid for cutting? You don't have any wounds that show me that you're a cutter."

He rolled his eyes. "Why should I care? You can do whatever the hell you want. If dying is what you want, I can kill you. And I'd enjoy it."

My eyes widened. He didnt' care? He wasn't going to tell me that I shouldn't cut myself? My eyes watered and a small tear slid down my face.

"Why are you crying?" he asked.

I looked away from him. I didnt' want him to see my tear. When sand crawled up my body adn moved my head toward him, I gasped in surprise and closed my eyes. He growled lightly before picking up my wrist and, when I opened my eyes, looked at the bloody slice. I would have pulled my arm away from him but the sand held me still.

Slowly, he lowered hsi head and slid his tongue across my crimson flesh, tasting my blood. My eyes widened in surprise and slight interest before trying to look away. His warm, wet muscle flet both strange and exciting. Every area of my "cleaned" skin tingled. When teh boy's tongue touched my slightly bleeding scar, I felt my body twitch at the sensation.

He must have too because he looked up at me. Blood stained his lips slightly. But I wasnt' afraid. I was... happy. I gave him a small smile and whispered, "Thank you... for accepting me."

The sand released me and he let go of my wrist. Wiping the blood with the back of his hand, he nodded. "When do you do this?"

I knew he was talkilng about my cutting. "Once a month..." That phrase reminded me of my "red river flow" so I added, "... during the three nights of the full moon."

"All three?"

I nodded, looking at the razor in my hand. His eyes followed mine and he took it from me. It glinted in the silver moon rays. I watched as his tongue flicked out and slid across the cold, bloody blade.

"You... really like blood, don't you?" I asked softly, clearly interested.

He looked at me carefully. "Hn..." he mumbled, returning his attention back to the blade.

Eventually, he got all of the blood off and he gave it back to me. Then he stood up and I knew he was going to leave. "Um...! Bye... what's your name?" I said quickly.

I could have smacked myself but when I looked up, I saw that he wasn't even looking at me. Instead, his beautiful, lonely eyes were fixated on the full moon, a look of remembrance in them. Pain momentarily flashed in them before he murmured, "Gaara... Sabaku No Gaara."


	2. The Invitation

Disclaimer: I only own my chara. Gaara... is not... sniffs mine... bursts into tears Enjoy the chapter!

Bloody Acquaintance

Chapter 2: The Invitation

I told the girl my name, the name that was feared by all the citizens of Suna. I have been the Kazekage for about four and a half years. Ever since the chunin exams when I was twelve. Now I am seventeen... and still as lonely as ever.

But this girl, the one who cuts herself for thre straight nights a month-- she has allowed me to touch her and taste her sweet, sweet blood. Even after my sand had forced her to look at me as it caressed her soft body, she didnt' yell out.

My mind should have been jumbled. My sens drunk on her blood's thick coppery scent. I had yet to want to kill her. And I had just told her my name. But for some reason... I was scared. I didn't know why but at that moment, I was more scared than I'd ever been and all because she knew my name.

I've never really felt fear before but I made Temari explain it to me. Your stomach plummets into your liver, anticipation of something good happening fills your hear-- things like that. And that was exactly what I was feeling. I hate it so much. But my face never twitched, never revieled my inner distress. I was a stone.

After I had revealed my name to the girl, I stood there, waiting for her to scream and provoke me to kill her. I was imagining myself standing next to her corpse, my body slathered in her delicious blood. Her lips were slightly open in a silent invitation for my crimson-stained lips to brush against hers. Her eyes were shut, making it look as if she were only asleep or waiting for me to show her some sort of affection.I shut my eyes to lock that vision in my mind. And I was suddenly no longer afraid.

When I opened my eyes, I realized that she hadn't made a sound. "Why have you not screamed? Do you know who I am... what I am?"

To my utter surprise, she shrugged, replying, "I've heard rumors but I don't really pay attention. They say you're a blood-thirsty monster but I can't judge you by what they say. So why should I scream? Besides, you're different from them. I like that.. a lot."

My sea-green eyes widened as my surprise sky-rocketed. "What... waht are you saying?" I asked, confused beyond all belief.

The girl chuckled. "Those hypocrits... they need to be more like you, Gaara. I wish I was..."

'What the Hell? I don't get it! I'm a murderer, a cold-blooded killer. I'm the worst... if not even worse than that. And she wishes that she were like me? She's got to be crazy... she just has to be. No sane person would admit something like that to the likes of me. No one. Because I... am truely and completely... alone, ' he thought, touching my heart with my finger tips. 'It hurts... being alone hurts so damn much.'

That girl must have felt my pain. She stood up and I backed away a few yards. But I just couldn't leave, couldn't bring myself to run from the excurciating, overwhelmingly lonely daggers piercing my body and soul from the inside-out. But...

"You know what's probably the most painful thing in the world?" the girl asked.

I looked at her through narrowed eyes. There she stood, right in front of me and my heart's pain increased seven-fold. "AHH!!" I cried out, the agony beginning to overtake my senses and forcing my eyes shut again.

She took a couple more steps closer and wrapped her arms around my torso, her head laying on my chest, on my heart. "Wounds that do not bleed... pain with no physical form. Gaara?"

My eyes opened into slits. But I quickly closed them. The girl's body against mine was so warm... I wanted to feel more of her. I was happy-- another emotions Temari told me about that involved the wanting more of something good-- that my sand wasn't protecting me from her affection. So I placed my arms awkwardly around her and pressed her tender body agianst mine. "What do you want, girl?"

"My name is Deserai... and do you want to watch my three-night "ritual"? I mean, your sand won't let you get hurt and you like blood so... I'll give you the blood I drain during the full moon in place of the blood that you can't shed from your own body."

I gripped her shoulders and held her at arm's length. Looking into her cerulean eyes, I could see that her invitation wasn't given to the "monster". It was for me. ME. "Do I... get to have you with me like this?" I asked softly. "With your body near mine?" I probably should have been embarrassed, but I decided not to even bother with that annoying emotion Maybe later... if I got around to it.

She blushed lightly but nodded. "If you want... I'll hug you whenever you want me to."

"You'll... stay with me?" I asked, giving her my deadliest glare. For someodd reason, I needed to be absolutely assured that this girl wouldn't leave me.

"No. I wouldn't leave you unless I was sure that I should for your safety. And even then, I probably wouldn't. I want to stay with you."

Her words could have been lies. Every one of them. But at that moment, I couldn't care less. I wanted them to be true. And I was willing to delude myself into believing her. Just this once.

I closed the gap and "hugged" her to me gently. But there was something I didn't understand... why wasn't my sand doing anything? Why was it giving me this freedom, this luxury of feeling another human being's body against mine?

Suddenly, I felt a strange pulling at my mouth and using one hand to keep her agaisnt me, I touched my lips and traced their shape. It was the shape that Naruto's lips were always in, just smaller, more concise and meaningful. I was smiling. And it held more emotion than all of my years of widening my eyes in shock and surprise, narrowing them in annoyance and anger.

"Will you be here tomorrow?" I asked softly.

I could feel her nod. "Tomorrow and the next night, " she replied, hugging me tighter.

As tight as she held me, my smile widened at least twice that. "I'll meet you there... Deserai." And I disappeared ina gust of wind-riden sand.


	3. Accidents Can Lead to Good Situations

I do not own Naruto but I wish I owned Gaara... I'd give him all the chocolate chip cookies he wanted.

Bloody Acquiantance

Chapter 3: Accidents Can Lead to Good Situations

As Gaara disappeared in my arms, I had to close my eyes to keep the sand out of them. But my mouth wasn't so lucky and I began to gag on the sand. It tasted bitter. It tasted like blood and I found myself wondering how he could stand tasting mind. 'Then again... the sand is probably soaked in the blood of Gaara's victims,' I thought, pulling a face of pure disgust. 'The blood of those who judge by rumors and what they want to see. Just the thought of that blood is horrible in adn of itself.'

But then, my disgust turned into sheer bliss and a happy blush spread across my cheeks. My small smile displayed the merest fraction of my joy. He was coming back... I had another chance to be with him "Gaara..." I whispered softly.

His name seemed to roll off my tongue with such grace that it sent chills up and down my spine. It was almost bitter-sweet, how it sounded. Like a bucket of warm chocolate. Yum!

Blushing at that comparison, I stood up, my razor safely tucked away in my sports bra. Home was a ten minute walk from the park and as it was now 2:45 A.M., I decided to run home as fast as I could. It would shave five minutes off easy. but it was dangerous since I've lost blood recently. So "as fast as I could" was actually a quick but paced jog. And so I went on my way, only shaving three minutes than my prefered five.

I entered the house quietly, knowing that Ritsu was already asleep. Lazy bum-of-a-ninja. 'Oh well. It's not like I could do anything about it,' I thought as I crept into my room. You would have thought that as a ninja, my brother would have heard me. But you'd be wrong. He once slept through a ten-hour sandstorm that almost destroyed our home. Dumbass.

Closing my door, I removed my sweaty clothes and got into bed, wearing my bra and a new pair of underwear. As for the razor tucked in my bra, I figured that since I usually slept like a corpse, I wouldn't stab myself. (Stupid, really stupid, but she does that often and has only sliced herself a couple of times with no stab wounds at all)

I kicked down the sheets and just lay there with my eyes shut. I saw Gaara behind my eyelids and my small, blissful smile retuened. I imagined his wet tongue against my skin again, his eyes staring up at me, as though daring me to move away from his touch. Rushes of pleasure seemed to beat thoughout my body and I wanted his tongue on my neck... my breasts... my stomach... my-- I stopped right there and my eyes flashed open, a deep blush etching all over my face and sat up quickly. Wincing sharply, I reaslized that I had accidently stabbed my breast.

When I cut on purpose, I liked it. It didn't hurt and I felt like I could keep doing it all night long. But my breasts were a different story. They were tender and definately did not take to ACCIDENTAL cutting.

Just as I was about to remove that damned blade, Gaara appeared at my window in that swirling sandstorm of his. Again, that chocolatey bitter-sweet feelign was back. Of course, in any other situation, I would have been happy for him being here. But with my hand in my bra and a dribble of blood escaping though my bra and soaking into the already black material, I just knew that I looked like some over-obsessed crazed chick who liked attacking her boobs with razors. "Uh... I, um... it's not what it looks like... I just... it was an accident..." I stammered weakly. He was staring at me and I suddenly felt naked. I blushed at my utter stupidity and noticed that Gaara's face never twitched.

Suddenly, he seemed to appear at my side. He was like a ghost that way. It felt strange but I wanted more and more of it. Slowly, his slightly rough hand slipped inside my bra and yanked out the blade. That quick action gave a jolt of pain that shot up and down my spine. My breath caught in my throat and I urgently forced the moan of pleasure that threatened to break free. Clamping my eyes shut, I didn't look at him, I was so embarrassed about how I was acting. Especially since it was him who reached inside my bra and caused me pain while trying to help me.

My eyes widened when I felt him taking off my bra. As soon as it was off, I hid my breasts from his view, staring at him in confused shock. His eyes were glazed with lust-- blood lust. And even though my bewilderment, I liked that look of his.

He took hold of my arms and moved them away from my chest. And he lowered his mouth to my bloody wound, using his tongue to lap up the little drizzle that had leaked out of my bra.

I couldn't help it. I knew exactly what I was doing but for the life of me, I was unable to stop my actions. As soon as his mouth touched the sensitive skin of my breast, I scrunched my eyes even tighter and tossed my head back. A moan was at the edge of my twitching lips.

As his tongue and mouth worked at my wound, I gathered up the strength to open one eye to look at him. When I did, there were his seafoam eyes, glaring and daring me to move. He gave the still bleeding cut a hard suck.

Gaara got his long-awaited moan and I bit my lower lip, drawing blood. Of course, whenever that blood dripped onto my collarbone, he went and licked the crimson liquid off. He was rewarded with another low moan.

Gliding his sultry tongue across my chin to my lips, he began to lick and suck at that wound. His arms carm around my waist and he pulled me closer to him. When the blood flow slowed, he turned those crimson-stained lilps to my own and his eyes momentarily flashed from his wonderful sea-green orbs to a golden color with a black design, then back again.

'The Shukaku...' I thought, about to panic. But I stopped it quickly. I didn't want to be like the rest of those idiots who ran from him before he did anything wrong. That would be shameful and it would thrust him back into the darkness, cold and alone.

So I moved a bit closer and wrapped my arms around his neck. I returned his kiss. His heart was beating as fast as mind, if not faster. I could feel it through my breasts that were pressed against his chest.

Gently, he broke the kiss and looked down at our chests. They were so close together, I guess he was surprised because he looked at me with questions in his eyes.

I gave him a soft smile, my cheeks were pink. I laid my head on his chest and slipped my arms around his torso, never wanting to leave his embrace.

Gaara looked down at me, not sure how to react to this sudden closeness. "Deserai..." he whispered.


	4. Yin and Yang

Okay... well, in the earlier chapters the POV was switching between Deserai and Gaara. Unfortunately, this chapter was supposed to be Gaara's turn but I got too far with Deserai's POV that I just decided to role with it. The next chapter will be Gaara's turn to tell us how he feels, promise. But anyway, on with the story!!! I do not own Gaara!!! TT.TT

Chapter 4: Yin and Yang

My heart skipped a beat when his sultry voice let out my name. But at that point in time, I felt that I owed it to my heart to give it that two second break. Before and after the skip, it went a thousand miles an hour and it just wouldn't slow down.

I was so close to him. Gaara's heart seemed to be racing mine. I could feel it, pounding against my ear. But for as close as we were, I wanted to be so much closer. Almost as if we were one. Together.

"Gaara..." I whispered back, snuggling closer into him.

He stiffened up and I thought I'd done something to upset him. I knew he'd never really had anyone and neither have I, but since I was a girl, he might not understand some of the emotions we both had... or maybe it was only me feeling this way. But I hoped not. I wanted us to feel the same, if only this one time. I didn't want to be alone in this suddenly endless sea of emotion. Not now... not ever.

"What's going on...? Why do I feel so strange? What did you do to me?" Gaara asked. I moved my head so I could look up at him. His face was the same as always but his eyes were a different story. They were clouded with such a mix of emotion that my breath caught in my throat. Only two emotions really stuck out-- confusion and lust.

Smiling up at him, I used one of my hands to cup his soft cheek. I felt it twitch under my palm. "Nothing. What you feel isn't because I put a spell on you or anything like that. These are your feelings. Tell me about them?"

"I don't know... how to describe them. All I know is that I'm confused and I don't want to let go." His arms tightened around me again, pressing me even closer to his body.

I giggled softly. "I don't want you to go either, Gaara. But I have work at 9. I need to sleep so I can do my job correctly."

"Take the day off?" he asked quickly.

"Huh?"

"Please? Pretend you're sick, call your work, and stay with me?" he asked, his lovely sea-green orbs looked as if he were begging.

I stared at his eyes for a second before I smiled mischieviously. "Alright. I'll play hooky... on one condition."

His eyes narrowed slightly. "What do you want?"

"I want you to kiss me."

"What?"

"You don't want to?" I asked in mock sadness and real surprise.

Gaara shrugged. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"So you will kiss me?" I asked happily. I admit it-- I was eager to have his lips on mine. But wouldn't you? They were so soft and gentle... a lot like him if you really got to know him. However, if you only knew him as the heartless, blood-thirsty monster, then at this moment, I know you would be staring at me as if I were a grinning idiot with tooth decay-- in bewildering confusion and disgust.

He shook his head and my heart seemed to plummet into my spleen. "I don't know..."

"Oh... okay," I said in disappointment. My mock saddness had decided to drop the "mock" and my eyes began to tear up.

"What is a "kiss"?" I heard heard his confusion-soaked voice ask me.

I looked up at him and saw that he was totally serious and as I laughed uncontrollably, my sad tears melted inot tears of happiness that seemed to increase in number as his confusion reached it's peak.

"Why are you laughing? What's so funny?" he asked.

"Y-you... haven't been... kissed?" I asked back, stiffling my laughter into giggles.

He shook his head. "No... what's so funny about that?"

I decided to go along with it even I knew the truth. "I would have thought that you would have been kissed at least once... I mean, you're so handsome. If I had met you a few years ago... I would have kissed you and ran like hell from embarrassment."

"If we met a few years ago, I would have killed you and bathed in your blood..." he muttered, looking away from me, only to have my hand cup his cheek and force him to face me.

"Kiss me... kill me... or bathe in my blood... so long as something happens between us... I'll be happy if you are."

"I... I want to kiss you... but I don't know how," Gaara admitted, a lost look in his eyes.

I smiled at him. "Let me help you..." I whsipered, drawing my arms around his neck and placing my lips on his with soft passion. I wanted so much more. I wanted us to be together. Connected in body and soul. I yearned to be Gaara, to be his heart. That way, we would live and we would die... together. Forever as one. Never alone again. But what I wanted... was the furthest thing from reality. And I suddenly felt the need to slice and dice... if only to keep him with me a moment longer. Because our connection was blood... and pain. I felt and shed the pain and blood and he had felt pain all his life but had no way to release it in it's purest physical form. We were like yin and yang.


	5. Understanding What Must Be Understood

Okay, this chapter is in Gaara's POV. and I do not own Gaara... but I do own Deserai. ...wish I could trade her for him though. :' )

Chapter 5: Understanding What Must Be Understood

I was confused. Big surprise... (not the obvious sarcasm) ever since I met this girl, everything has become more confusing. She was so crystal clear with everything but my emotions were like murky mud. And when crystal is plunged into mud, the crystal just becomes dirty. That was the case with me. Her words were understood but I didn't understand. I heard them but I didn't know what she was trying to tell me.And now, here we stood, Deserai half-naked and holding onto me as our lips ment tenderly. This "kiss" was... wonderful.

My arms wove around her bare waist. Her skin was so warm. I wanted to feel more of her. Take in her lovely rose scent that was suddenly choking the life out of me. But although I was "dying", I didn't move away. My "dying" was giving me a "new life" and I wanted it so badly because of her... my Deserai.

I finally shut my eyes and pressed my lips against hers, loving the delicate taste of honey upon them. I licked her lips to taaste them even more. To my surprise, she parted her lips. What was I supposed to do? Do I stick my tongue inot her mouth? Or would that be bad? I wanted to taste the inside of her mouth, past the gateway-- her lips-- into that forbidden paradise. But I also wanted her. If I was to keep her with me... I needed to do this right.

Her tongue flicked across my lips and I opened my lips like she had done. When I felt Deserai's smooth tongue slip past my lips, I temporarily lost control. My sand wrapped around us both and helped me move her even closer. It still wasn't enough, though. I needed more of her. My hands moved to carress the soft skin of her back and I felt her heart rate. It seemed to pound violently against my palm.

I hate the laws of physics-- they made us HAVE to breath... A LOT. We stopped the kiss and as we panted, Deserai's head was on my collarbone and my head was laying on her soft black hair.

"D-did you... like the k-kiss?" she asked, out of breath.

I nodded. "Why...?" I asked her softly.

"Why what?"

"Deserai... why do I feel so... weak? What kind of spell... am I under? What jutsu... did you use?" I asked her quietly. Her name was like silk... beautiful and something I wished to hold close. I was holding her and she was, to say the least, beautiful. Her name suited her perfectly.

"Tell me... how you feel. Everything. I can tell you why you feel that way... according to how I see it," she replied, looking into my eyes.

Taking a deep breath, I began. "My stomach.. something's inside, messing around with my innards. My heart is going a thousand miles an hour. I feel like I am drowning in luke-warm water... and never want to come up for air. And here--" I moved back and touched just above her breast. "-- there... my heart flip-flops and I can't make it stop. Am I... sick? Maybe I'm dying...?"

For some reason, Deserai started laughing. But I didn't get it. I was being totally serious, spilling my feelings to her and she just laughed at them? That hurt. That really hurt a lot! "Why are you laughing now?!" I exclaimed, obviously whining like a spoiled six-year-old.

She shook her head. "you're not dying or sick. What you're feeling is natural. I feel the same way. You're not alone... I'm with you. Do you want me to tell you what's going on with us? Do you want me to confess my feelings?" she stated with soft humor. But her humor quickly shifted into an emotion that made her beautiful blue eyes light up. I held her closer to me and nodded gently.

Deserai closed her eyes and blushed a bit before she began. "Butterflies fluttering in your stomach... your heart beat increase just by being around a certain person... a warm feeling consuming your being... I have heard rumors of what those symptoms mean. Not even a day ago, I would have sworn that none of this was possible, that the people who told me about this were crazy. Now I think I owe them an apology."

"What did they say? Is it bad?" I asked. She was making sense but at the same time, she wasn't.

"It's not bad. They said that you feel like this when... when you are in... love."

"Love?" I asked, praying that I misheard. When she nodded, I sighed. I had heard right and I still wish I hadn't. "They must be wrong."

"What?" Deserai asked. Her question was soaked in confusion and surprise.

"I'm never going to be in love... because I can't love anyone. Only myself."

She gasped. Her eyes were wide and I could smell her saltwater tears. I had shut my eyes as I explained to her what was told me so many years ago. Even after all this time, it still hurt to know that I could never truely experience what others could. no matter how strongly I felt, I just couldn't. Love was a weakness that has been used against man since the dawn of time. And I had been warned to never let love happen to me in such a harsh way that it might as well be engraved into my soul. Even the Shukaku warned me of the pains that love could bring. The "love" scar it gave me was my only tangible warning-- my constant reminder.

"I don't believe that..." I opened my eyes and looked down at the girl in my arms. Why didn't I let her go? There was a half-naked girlin my arms and I couldn't remove her from my arms. Something just wouldn't let me. It was a simple enough concept so why was it so damn hard?

Deserai gave me a gentle smile and continued, "... whoever told you that must have had a difficult lovelife. They must have been hurt very badly to say that you couldn't love. But... love isn't bad... when you have the right person by your side. Gaara... I love you... adn I would never want to hurt you."

I couldn't speak. My chest felt tight and my heart began beating in my throat. Water threatened to flood my eyes. And I couldn't contain it. A small saltwater river leaked out of my right eye and I kissed her gently. Why did I want so badly to believe that this girl loved me? Because she was the only one to tell me that... and I was willing to delude myself into believing her words... even if she was lying.


	6. Shukaku

Time again for yet another chapter!! Thanks to everyone who has reviewed "Bloody Acquaintance"!!! ... I still don't own Gaara-kun but I'm gonna be gettin' me a plushie of him... so it's ALMOST just as good... ALMOST.

Chapter 6: Shukaku

I gently cupped his cheek and used my thumb to wipe away the stream of tears. Kissing him back, I revelled in the sweet and salty taste of his lips. Gaara's tongue grazed my lips and he pulled at the lower lip with his suddenly very sharp teeth. I opened my lips slightly and slipped my tongue out of my mouth.

Gaara removed his teeth from my flesh and his serpentine muscle escorted my own into his mouth. The sand that held us together, out "bond"... it left me. The air felt cold against my bare skin.

My eyes, amazingly, had been opened during that kiss, my heavy lids screaming at me to close them to enjoy the kiss more. I resisted. And because I had, I saw the sand cover the left half of his face and his felt arm. His sand-covered eye changed to the golden design she had seen earlier. It's white turned black. 'Shukaku...' she thought, breaking off the kiss.

"So you are the girl... Deserai," Shukaku drawled. My breath caught in my throat. He was using Gaara's boice, although it was harsher, raspier. It was almost... angry.

I swallowed and nodded. "Y-yes... and you are... the Shukaku?"

"Yes. You're not as stupid as you look... you're very pretty, though. But why haven't you put your bra back on?"

I looked down and blushed, removing my hands to wrap my arms around my chest. "Sorry... I guess I just didn't notice."

A split second later, I found my wrists pinned against the wall by Gaara/Shukaku's hands, my chest once again exposed. I looked deeply into his mismatched eyes. "Wh-what?" I asked. "I don't understand..."

He gave me a crooked grin. Half of his teeth had sharpened, giving him the look of a beast. 'a monster...' she thought, shutting her eyes to block out that horrible sight. But it wouldn't go away. "I never told you to cover yourself, did I?"

I shook my head no. My eyes were shut and I think he was irritated because his voice became even angrier than it already sounded. "Look at me," he growled lowly. When I wouldn't, he began to shout at me, trying to make me look.

Eventually, I opened my eyes and saw him grin viciously. "Are you afraid of me? Do you want to run? Fine!" Shukaku got off me and pointed towards the door. "Run away! Get away and leave the boy alone!!"

I stood up as the door opened. My brother may be a heavy sleeper but even he could wake up when it really counted. "Deserai?! Why is HE here?! What happened?! And why are you HALF NAKED!?"

"Ritsu!" I cried, covering myself from view.

He gasped and glared venomously at Shukaku. "You monster! How dare you try to violate my sister in her own bedroom! Get out of here! You're not wanted here! Or ANYWHERE!!"

Shukaku narrowed his eyes and looked at me. "And you?"

"Huh?" I asked.

"Do you want me to go? Just say the word and I'll leave. You'll never have to see me until the day you die."

Ritsu decided to answer for me. "What kinda stupid question is that?! Of course she wants you to leave! Why would she even consider letting you stay with her after you tried to take her like some blasted animal in heat?!"

"I would rather SHE tell me. I don't need YOU to tell me how that stupid girl feels."

"Stupid?! WHY I SHOULD JUST--!!"

"Enough, Ritsu." I said coldly, effectively silencing him.

But not for long. "Deserai, I--."

"I don't care. I'm not a little kid anymore. I don't need you to tell me what is wrong or right."

"But--."

"No "buts". In case you haven't noticed, I've been cuting my wrists for years. Everyone says it's wrong and I still do it. I know it's bad but you don't understand. It's just like with Gaara. You all prejudged him before he even DID anything wrong. Anyone in his position would have crinisized me when he saw what I was doing to myself. But instead, he accepted me! Unlike everyone else that was supposed to care about me! None of you understood me! He didn't even know me and all he did was ask me what I was doing... he never asked me why I was doing it! He accepted me and I accept him-- Shukaku and all!"

"But Deserai--!"

"No, i won't listen to your condescending words! Get out!"

"Think about what you are doing!"

"I have! Now go!"

"You choose that ABOMINATION over your own FLESH and BLOOD?!"

"LEAVE!!"

Suddenly a wave of sand plowed into Ristu and tossed him out and into a wall, knocking him unconscious. The sand came back and tenderly wrapped it around my upper torso. It was then that I realized how cold I was. The sand felt so warm. "Deserai... get dressed. You're coming with us," Shukaku said, looking away from me.

I turned to look at him, surprised at his words. Under the light of the silver moon, he looked different to me somehow. I guess that's what happens when a raccoon demon takes over half of your body.

He chuckled and looked back at me. It was that look in his eye. Not even Gaara looked at me like that. Maybe he was taking a liking to me. "Stupid girl..." I guess not.

Smiling towards him, I gave a small sigh. But I went to my closet and saw my emergency bag-- already packed in case of a raid or if Gaara went to sleep. Quickly slipping on a bra and shirt from my closet, I picked up the bag and turned to him. He walked over and, pulling me into a loose hug, we vanished in a swirl of his blood-soaked sand.


	7. Gaara's House

Sorry it took so long to get this chapter out. I've had it done for a couple of days now but I couldn't find the time to put it on. So I'm doing this just before I cook supper. I don't own Gaara-san. (glares at Gaara) How many times are you going to make me say this? (Gaara: as many times as necessary so you remember. Besides, you keep telling your friends that I am yours... which is NOT true) You're so mean... Anyway, enjoy the chapter and when you finish, give me a review! By the way, this is in Gaara's POV but he's hardly in this one.

Chapter 7: Gaara's House

We appeared inside my room. Shukaku was still in control so I had no idea what was going on. "Temari! Kankuro! Get in her NOW!" the raccoon demon shouted angrily. It glared into the darkness of my room.

Five seconds and tons of frantic footsteps later, my elder siblings knocked on the door. There was no way they were going to burst into my rom. Thy obviously learned their lesson the last time Kankuro ran in without my permission. I had them so well trained. Shukaku said, "Enter."

They opened the door and walked in, not bothering to turn on the lights. They could see well enough thanks to the moonlight shining through my windowed balcony door. "Temari..." it "greeted" the tall, blonde, green-eyed girl. She wore purple and plenty of black fishnet. Temari was the eldest of the siblings.

"... Kankuro..." Shukaku continued, glaring at the black-wearing, purple make-uped middle child. He had a white-wrapped puppet on his back. Temari usually had a large fan on her back but she'd been in too much of a hurry to put it on. Kankuro was rarily seen without his puppet, Crow.

"Shukaku..." they bothed greeted with fear in their voices.

Kankuro suddenly noticed Deserai, who was still in his/my arms. "Who's that? Did you bring her here to...?" He didn't finish, afraid of death.

"No. This girl is of some importance to my host. Though I don't know why he would choose such a stupid girl over the other females in the region. Even if there were only stupid girls, there must be thousands more who are prettier than this one. Hmph, He must be desperate for any attention he can get."

"What do you mean?" Temari asked quietly.

"No brains, too skinny, no breasts, no ass... your brother was OBVIOUSLY desperate. And with no female companions for practically ALL of our life, I don't blame him. I just think we can do better than Deserai here."

Both of the elder sand ninja looked toward the mentioned girl. She stared at the ground with a small smile etched on her pale face. Temari felt so sorry for the girl-- she suddenly seemed so fragile... so defensless. As if she was thrown to the sharks with only a can of tuna to distract them. 'Or in this case... a blood-thirsty raccoon...' she thought, giving a soft sigh. She really felt for the poor girl. But she wouldn't say anything against the demon.

"That's not true." Kankuro thought differently about what had been said. He went closer to the demon's "captive" and gently pulled her away, facing her towards Shukaku/me. "Does she have breasts..." He cupped them from behind. "... or are you STILL blind?"

Deserai just stood there, eyes wide in shock, cheeks red in anger. Temari twitched, really wishing she had brought her fan along. As for Shukaku... all it's attention was on her "outlined" chest. "K-Kankuro-san... please let go..." she replied as calmly as she could.

"Not until he admits that he's wrong. You DO have boobs... and very nicely-shaped ones at that!"

"He doesn't have to...!" she half-begged him.

"Don't you care if he knows that you have 'em?"

"Not really. I don't care so you can let go... NOW."

"But--."

"LET ME GO, KANKURO-SAN!!" she suddenly shouted, her face bright red with rage and embarrassment.

If I had been in control of my body. my dearest brother would have suffered the wrath of my sand coffin. However... I wasn't, thanks to my stupid raccoon demon! Yes, I was angry. And since Shukaku knew how I felt, a giant fist of sand knocked Kankuro away from Deserai. "Don't touch the girl again..." Shukaku said emotionlessly.

"I thought you didn't care about her!" the pervert shouted.

"I don't. My host does. And knoiwng him, you would have been dead by now."

Temari sighed and turned on the light. Black walls resembled the dark shadows we were shrouded in mere moments before. Golden sand covered the floor. The dressers and door was bright red. A single windowed door, opposite of the dark blood red and black bed, lead to the outdoor balcony. With so much black and red, the room could have been defined as a gothic version of Hell, minus the flames and tortured souls but it had a demon tormentor. I liked my room even with that demon.

"So Deserai is gonna live with us?" the eldest sibling asked.

Shukaku nodded. "She'll sleep in this room, unless Gaara doesn't want her near him in bed. Until then, get out of my room."

when Kankuro and Temari left, Deserai seemed a bit lost as to what she was supposed to do. Shukaku went to his balcony door and opened it, going to stand on the balcony without a word. She took a deep breath but before she could say anything, the raccoon demon growled, "Turn off the light and come here."

She did as she was told and took a place next to him. "Yes?" she asked, her earlier embarrassment pushed back for later. Hopefully much later.

"I'm going to let the boy take controle again. Just thought I'd warn you so you didn't call him by my name."

She stared at him for a moment before leaning over and kissing the cheek of his monster-half.

His human half's cheek turned slightly red. "What did you do that fore, stupid girl?"

"Just because I think there's more to you than blood shed and murder. My friends told me that the only way I could ever get laid was if Gaara fell asleep... and you could come out and... and rape me..." Deserai replied, looking at the ground.

"Maybe later..."

"WHAT?!"

"Just joking." Shukaku laughed cruelly.

She crossed her arms. That wasn't very funny," she pouted.

It shrugged. "Everybody's a critic," Shukaku mumbled, releasing his influence from Gaara, the sand returning to the gourd.

"Ugh... what happened?" He touched his head in pain.

Deserai hugged him. "Nothing much, but welcome back."


	8. Tears of Blood

This one is a bit longer than the others! X'D I am so happy!! Hope you enjoy!! ... I still don't own Gaara... D'X

Chapter 8: Tears of Blood

I held Gaara so gently against me, I felt like I must have been the wind itself. What Shukaku had said must have really affected me. At least, more than I thought. Why did I pay such close attention to the demon's words? They must have been some sort of a scare tactic so I would end up saying how I really felt about him. It had to have been a set up-- the Shukaku was definately smart enough to plan out the actions of others just by using their personalities to its advantage. But there was something that it didn't plan on. I wasn't suppose to acept Gaara. I was supposed to insult him back becuase of what Shukaku had said about me-- the emotions of anger and embarrassment were suppose to cloud my judgement until it was too late. But they didn't. And they wouldn't in the future.

Unfortunately, the demon's words brought around an insecuraty. Why would Gaara want me? Sure, I accepted him as he was... but... he came to me out of nowhere. He took a slight interest in me... or maybe it was my blood. The blood that poured out of me to replace the tears that were left unshed. But my blood is me. It defines me. It holds all of my emotions, many of my memories. It holds nothing good. And he still wanted me. Me. Out of all of the women that could show him the best this world has to offer, he chose me.

Suddenly, Gaara moved away from my touch. There was something about his eyes-- his lovely, matching sea-green eyes-- that was strange. The look in them semed unsure and worried. Perhaps he was unsure why he was so worried. His eyes raked my body and I shivvered as they did. He had already seen me topless and I felt naked under his urgent gaze. "Did it hurt you? Tough you? Anything?" Gaara asked. He had obviously been looking for something and couldn't see it.

I shook my head. "No. The Shukaku hugged me and tried to scare me away from you. It isn't as bad as everyone says. It's not kind but it protected me from words that could have destroyed me. Words that came from my brother."

"What? What did he say to you?"

"At first... they were directed towards the Shukaku and you. I told him off because he didn't understand. And he still doesn't. I had to stop his words. They attacked you but I couldn't stand them. He might as well have called me the monster."

"Heh... he's not very original, is he? But he couldn't call you a monster. You're not like me."

"But I want to be." Gaara looked at me with widened eyes. "When you kiss me, I kiss back. When you hold me, I want to get closer. And when you taste my blood, electricity races through my veins. I want to be a monster becuase what goes better wtih a monster than a monster."

He shook his head. "No. You're not a monster. You are too-- hey..." Gaara looked around. "We're not in your room. why are we... on my balcony?"

"I can't live at home anymore because of my brother. Shukaku said that I could stay here with you," I replied, blushing lightly.

"Oh... really? Not that I'm saying no. The Shukaku just... isn't nice like that." He scratched his head lightly. "Well, you can sleep in my bed since I don't."

My blush darkened and on the balcony with the moonlight beaming on my pale skin, I'm sure my cheeks were greyish-black. "He was kinda planning on that... until you got tired of my body near yours in... um, in... bed..." My cheeks are probably stark black now. Curse my obsessive-compulsive truth-telling!

Gaara nodded with his eyes shut. "That sounds more like that perverted raccoon..." He sighed lightly. "I apologize for that then. I'm sure it was very... embarrassing to hear that."

"... just... don't let Kankuro near me when he wishes to prove that I am a very... "womanly" girl, okay? And almost ALL of my "embarrassment" will vanish."

"What?"

"Please, dont' ask. It's too... creepy..."

"What did my perverted brother do?"

"Um... something perverted..."

Gaara was getting angry. His eyes were narrowed and his usual blank frown was no longer blank.

"Gaara? I'm sorry... I shouldn't ahve mentioned it." I looked at the ground only to have him manually move my face to look into his eyes.

"Tell me what he did..." he growled, telling me silently that I should be as detailed as possible.

"Well... Shukaku said that I had no... breasts so Kankuro showed it that I did by... grabbing them from behind... and he wouldn't let go until Shukaku said that I... had boobs..."

"... I'll kill him..." he said emotionlessly.

I gently touched his arm. Smiling up at him, I replied, "The Shukaku punished him for touching me. I think that punishment he took could cound as a warning. And if he does it again, you can kill him. Please dont' kill Kankuro for such a minor offense."

"Minor? MINOR?! You are mine, Deserai! Mine! Kankuro can't have you! No one can! Only I can touch you and he should know that!"

"Gaara... you've never had a woman before so I am sure that he didn't know." I didn't mind being his. I could have been his damned dog, his sex slave, and I would have been happy. He was my everything now. I no longer lived for Ritsu, worked for his comfort. "I'm not worth your brother's death. He is more valuable than I am..."

"No! You're wrong!"

I took a small step back. Gaara had a crazed look in his angry eyes. "I'm not very strong, Gaara. I'm not a ninja like you or your siblings or Ritsu. I'm not pretty, either.And because I'm not all of those things, even the Shukaku asked why you chose me over the other prettier girls."

"Shut up!" he shouted angrily. "That demon knows nothing!!"

"Gaara? I'm sorry for making you so mad. I guess I just have no confidence when it comes to my good qualities. I can only see the bad. Please calm down. it's okay. I think it's better to accept your flaws that try to convince yourself that you are wonderful."

"Because you can only see your flaws. To say how good ourself feels so empty. Deserai... you are beautiful. In every aspect of the word. You have a kindness that no one has given me after they've found out about the Shukaku. You are perfect... absolutely perfect, Deserai. Don't change. Don't listen to those people who are only jealous of you. What they've said to you are the insecuraties they see in themselves."

"Gaara..." I said breathlessly. Tears gathered in my cerulean eyes and a few tumbled down my pale cheeks.

He noticed them and touched my cheek. His eyes were now shining with worry. "Why are you crying? I didn't mean to... what did I do wro--?"

I was so rude. I didn't let him finish his question. I tried to wait but... I couldn't. I sprung into action and kissed him harshly on the lips, wrapping my arms around his torso and sending both of us to the ground in a tackle attack. The Shukaku must have took offense to that whole "knows nothing" comment because Gaara's protective sand didn't come out to keep him from harm.

He broke the kiss and said, "What was that fore? Ow..."

"Hee hee... I couldn't help it. I just... had to. Gaara, can I tell you something?"

"Well..." he replied, touching my wet cheeks. "... will it get you to stop crying?"

I smiled at him and touched his hair. it was so soft, it felt like water sifting through my fingers. I lowered my digits to touch the blackened skin of his eyes. And even more to his lips. They were slightly moist and reminded me of peach rose petals after a spring rain. I blushed gently at my thoughts. My fingertips moved up and lightly brushed against his kanji-scar. "Gaara, I... I love you. Even if you don't love me back, I can't stop feeling this way. Please don't push me away. I want to be wtih you, as friends at the very least."

He looked at me but I couldn't see his facial expression through my tears. "I'm sorry. I promised to stop crying but--"

Gaara's lips practically devoured mine, his hands cupped my jaw bones to pull my face closer to his. A few seconds later, he released me and said, "Don't. You shouldn't apologize when you're crying for a better reason. I... can't tell you what you want me to say. I'm not ready." He looked to the side, away from my eyes. "Forgive me..."


	9. When the Words Won't Come

I have realized one thing in this chapter (POV is Gaara, by the way)... so many Gaara-fans who are reading this are gonna KILL me... so sorry in advanced... but good things come to those who wait:3 (yes, that is my excuse. and I'm stickin' by it!)

Chapter 9: When the Words Won't Come

The Shukaku itself had given us permission to be together. I was free to love her, even if it was just physical "love-lust". I knew the words, I felt the words in my melting ice-heart. So long had I been waiting to tell someone, speak those very words which I had deemed worthless to me. That's right. The words I had said were not my own, but those of the people who kept me by myself. Alone with no one to even lend me a shoulder to cry on. But today, under the full moon, the most beautiful girl I have ever seen pledged her love for me. And I couldn't say it back. I must be the lowest jerk in the world. If Shikamaru had done what I am doing to Temari... I shudder to think about what she would do. My sister had a fairly bad temper when provoked.

But not my Deserai, no. She gently took my hand in hers and raised it to her face. Rubbing her cheek against its back, she said, "I understand. You want to be 100 sure before you rush into love. I've waited this long for you, I can wait until you're ready."

I watched as she shut her eyes, still nuzzling the back of my hand with that soft smile of hers. That was the smile I loved... ARGH! I can THINK it but it was so damn hard to SAY! "How did I get so lucky? I have a demon inside me... a an angel falls in love wtih me." I watched her eyes open to look at me with that innocent sea blue gaze. That look always made me start to think of ways to make her more... sinful. And also forced me to gain control again. But every time she looked made it more difficult to stop. Soon, i dont' think I will be able to stop myself. How can a girl who cuts herself every month still be so innocent.I watched as she blushed. "I'm not an angel. I mean... I just met you tonight and I've already fallen in love wtih you and I'm living with you. And, in everyone's eyes, the worst part is... is that if I could go back in time, I wouldn't change a thing." And she smiled a smile that was reserved for me.

That was the last straw! The gates of my "love" burst open. I kissed her harshly, one hand dove into her hair, the other snaked around her hips, pulling her flush against me. I knew she was kissing me. I pushed my hips even closer to hers, letting her feel my want for her. I knew she was kissing me back. She gave a sharp cry and broke the kiss by tossing her head back in pleasure. I kissed her neck, licking and nipping at her pulsating veins. "You taste so swet..." I growled.

She moaned as I lightly ground my hips into hers. And she tentatively moved against me, lowering her head and kissing my forehead as my lips attacked her collarbone. "Th-thank you... I guess I'll take that as a-a compliment..."

Her chest began to move toward me quickly as her breathing increased. Her beautiful rounded breasts... I had seen them once when she'd cut them... her blood had stained the lily white skin that had hidden itself under her clothes. I wanted to see them again. "I want to... take off your shirt. Will you let me?"

Deserai nodded. "I give you my body... Gaara, I am yours," she whsipered, grabbing my hand and pulling me into my room.

I had completely forgotten that we were on my balcony. I was slightly embarrassed and even with my control, I couldn't help a small blush dusting over my cheeks. But even though I was "in the wrong", I passed it off as if I'd known where we were. "I suppose you aren't a fan of open displays of affection..." I said with a smirk.

She chuckled. "It's not that... it's a lot more comfortable here, that's all." She then hugged me tightly. "Yes... definately more comfortable."

I held her back as my hands crept to the bottom of her shirt. My sand came out and pinned her hands up in the air as mind pulled her shirt up over her head and tossed it into a corner as though it was a snake or something BRIGHT PINK.

"Um... Gaara?"

"Yes?"

"Can you let go of my hands?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"I'm not done yet." I looked at her black bra. It was different fromt he last one. It had clasps... and lace. It was a real bra that separated each breast and clung gracefully to her flesh. I was curious about that bra so I lightly brushed a finger agaisnt the material that was in the center. It was silk. But even more curious was that her breast reacted immediately after I touched it. The sensitive peak hardened and made itself known to me. It seemed to be reaching out to me, beckoning me to do something, anything so long as it was me. 'And not that pervert Kankuro.' I admit that I still do not accept my brother touching her. But I promised Deserai that I wouldn't kill him. So I had to resort to the next best thing-- painful torture. Very painful torture.

I listened to her gasp in surprise. She must have not known that they could do that. She apparently had never played with herself, experimented with her body. And because I had an unexperienced girl near me, I felt... happy. Now I knew why she was so addicting. An untouched core of a beautiful girl who was giving herself to me.. my face could split in two at the grin that ran across my face.

"Are you sure you want me to have you? I'm a virgin... by the basic fact that I've never had intercourse with a female. The Shukaku is a whild demon who only really kills because it gives it a sense of accomplishment and pleasure. It will contribute in any sex that we have."

I wasn't as unexperienced as Deserai. Unlike her, I have touched myself, just to see what it was like. It felt good so I kept doing it. With that racoon demon coaching me from inside, I became the Kazekage of masterbation. Kankuro, obviously, knew of "male difficulties". He gave me a large stack of "mature" magazines to look through. I buried them in the sand for later.

I came out of my deep thoughts when her reply cut through. "Yes... I want you... to be the one to break me. Please? Please be with me... if only this one night."

"I'll do you one better. I'll stay by your side until you don't want me," I replied. I'd kill her after that, of course. In her sleep. Painlessly. So no other man could defile her as I will.

"That will never happen. I love you, Gaara."

"Even if I can't tell you it completely... though I cannot say those three words... I have three other words for you-- "right back at'cha". I got those words from naruto... but I mean them in a different way... I'm going to make you mine... tonight."

"Not now?"

"No. You need to rest up. I have big plans for you. Now get to sleep. I want you well rested, Deserai."

She blushed as I pushed her onto the bed. Covering her with the blanket, I laid beside her and held her close. I wasn't going to sleep but I'd be damned if SHE would sleep WITHOUT me. "Goodnight, Gaara."

"Goodnight... my love." Hey, I said it! ... fine, I was close!!


	10. Sweet Dreams and Promises

Sorry it's been so long since I've updated. I'd gotten a job, had surgery, and now my internet is being a total bitch. I just realized that, while looking through the last nine chapters, I am the QUEEN of SAPPY SPEECHES!!! I totally didn't mean for that to happen but... I guess deep down... at least when it comes to Gaara-san, I am a sappy kinda person. I hope you enjoy this chapter and I don't own the Naruto plot-line but... I got a Gaara plushie! So I kinda own him!! hugs plushie Gaara

Chapter 10: Sweet Dreams and Promises

I love to dream. Nightmares are acceptable but not every night. And day, in Gaara's case. But there's one type of nightmare that I've never been able to handle-- one with pain. When you sleep, your body supposedly numbs and paralyzes itself to keep you from acting out your dream/nightmare. However, while you lie in your bed safe and sound, that pain that sometimes arises makes you realise just how "safe" you really are.

I was running. From what, I didn't know. Nor did I care. All that went through my mind was... it burned. At first, whatever I ran from was nice... I didn't want to stay away. I was like a moth to a flame. Then, suddenly, that wonderful feeling melted away as a hot, burning sensation flooded over me... and I knew I couldn't stay. So I didn't. And whatever it was followed me. Chased me. Stalked me. Blood wasn't the only think that coursed through my veins. Fear struck a cord throughout my body as I knew that the upcoming pain would be great... and I didn't know if I could handle it on my own. No... not alone. Not by myself...

"No!" I shouted, jerking up into a siting position. And taking Gaara, who had been holding me, with me.

Gaara asked, "What's wrong, Deserai? You were whimpering and groaning loud enough to wake the dead." He was still holding onto me but his grip was stronger.

And then came the tears. I practically flung myself at him, my face buried into his chest as I cried my leftover fear into his warm skin. Then I pulled away, blushing. He was shirtless! And, boy, was he FINE!! "I-I'm sorry... it's not you... I've just never..."

"Cried into a man's chest before?" Gaara finished my sentance and I nodded, blushing even darker.

To my utter surprise, he gave a small smile, bare traces of a blush scattered across his cheekbones.

My eyes widened at the sight and a gasp was wretched from my throat when he drew an arm tightly around my torso and pulled me back into his tan chest. "I think I like you here... you're so nice and warm..." When my tears poured over, he quickly said, "That was supposed to be a compliment. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you cry."

I shook my head. "Not you... my dream."

"But a dream isn't real..."

"But it is a message from your subconscious. Your wishes, your needs... your fears. Besides, my dream held so much pain that I actually felt it. At first, everything was okay... but then... a burning sensation overcame me. I ran away and whatever it was started chasing me. I was so scared..." I clung to him as the tears came faster. And I felt his embrace tighten around me.

He sighed. "Your night hours are filled with pain... today will be a wonderful dream... from which you will awaken frm in the morning."

"What?" I asked, looking up into his gorgeous eyes.

Gaara smirked at me. "I don't plan on letting you sleep, Deserai. The only way you will is if I fuck you unconscious, which I will."

A cherry couldn't have been redder than my cheeks. And i buried my blazing face into his chest. Embarrassed-- far too embarrassed to give him a light glare for doing that to me-- I breathed in his scent. I smelled the desert... and a brief hint of sandlewood. It was masculine with a dab of femininity in it. "You smell wonderful..." I mumbled into his chest.

"I do?" he asked softly. When I nodded, he said, "Just wait until tonight... when out scents mix together.It's going to drive you crazy."

"And you..."

"I don't deny that one bit. I want to be drunk on your scent and the sight of you under me as I pound into your tight tunnel."

"Where do you come up with this stuff?"

"Magazines. Kankuro--."

"Ahh... say no more. I think I know what kind of "magazines" he gave you. Just what the world needs..."

"What?"

"Huh?"

"What does the world need?"

"Oh. A pervert with a stack of porn at his beck-and-call."

"The world doesn't need that."

"... it was sarcasm, Gaara."

The look he gave me was priceless so I laughed at it. Two seconds later, we were outside and he raised the sand up to reveal a large bunch of sinful magazines. "See?"

"Yeah. But why did you show me them?"

"I want to look at them and thought that you might as well see what we could do tonight." He picked up a bunch and we reappeared in his room. Sand travels fast, no?

While we were outside, the sun was just peaking up over the horizon. It was around 5:30 in the morning.

"Um, does Kankuro or Temari wake you up in the morning?" I asked shyly. God knows I DIDN'T want to get caught in a room with GAARA and a huge stack of PORN!

"No, but Temari cooks breakfast at eight."

Fear struck me like lightning when I heard that. "Um... I'll cook. I think it would be safer if I do than... not." Even though I was obviously slamming her cooking, I still tried to be nice about it.

Gaara hugged me tightly , his face in the crook of my neck. "And maybe you could teach her not to use three tubes of wasabe on eggs?" I had a feeling that if he was like normal boys, he would be crying in gratitude and hopefullness. Boy, am I glad he's not normal... if there really was such a thing as normal.

"I'll teach her everything I can but..."

"But what? What's wrong?" There was concern in his voice. Concern... and slight panic.

"Well, I cook using my senses. If I think something needs something, I put it in. I rarily use recipes so... I'm going to have to train her senses first. I might need you and Kankuro to help me convince her to improve. And by "convince", I mean "force"."

He nodded. "Granted. I know that we'll help in any way possible so long as we know that at the end of this mission there is a good meal for us."

"Are boys always hungry or do girls conserve their food energy better?" I asked, laughing.

He pulled me closer and whispered into my eat, "You'll be glad for my appetite when I am drinking in your juices, my sweet Deserai."

A gasp brooke through my lips when I felt Gaara's moist tongue flick the tender flesh just behind my earlobe. And I became hot once more, my body tingling with the excitement rushing through my veins. "Gaara..." I moaned.

He replied with a chuckle and pushed me back on the bed. "We'll sleep in... go back to sleep."

I knew he would just stay awake and look at porn so I said, "But you were going to show me these..."

Gaara chuckled, "Then let your "education" begin, innocent-Deserai-who-shall-soon-be-mine."


	11. Hints

Sorry it's been so long. I had surgery (a bone graph: taking bone from my right hip and putting the bone in my upper lip to stabalize my bite)) on the 25th of September so I've kinda been out of commission in the writing department. But I'm back and I've brought Gaara and Deserai! In this one, I've added some things that are probably not in the real Suna so bare with me! Also, Gaara is a little... talkative. But no flames because he totally trusts Deserai, even if his words are hard for him to say-- Gaara never blabs secrets without thinking things through. And besides, he practically told his little "secret" to Naruto when he was attempting to kill Rock Lee in the hospital. So again... NO FLAMES!! Now, without further ado...

Chapter 11: Hints

Three hours later, I was looking at the magazines alone. Deserai had viewed some of them but eventually, sleep took her over. Temari had called to both of her work places, telling them that Deserai quit. I'll have to scold her later for making her jobless... but I cannot say that I disagree with her decision. Had I called, I would have done the same thing. But Temari is a better speaker than I am so I made her do it for me, using my third eyes to make sure she did it.

Breakfast was ready... and I was slightly... just a teeny bit... okay, I was TERRIFIED! The things my sister has done to pancakes...

Needless to say, I decided to wait for Deserai to wake up. So there I lay, pictures of open magazines scattered everywhere. I imagined her as the women and me as the men. Instant hard-on. It was a shame she wasn't awake. I could have poisoned her mind with those same images if she was. But alas... she wasn't so the only mind I was tainting was my own fairly sinful one. Such a waste.

"Nng..." Deserai moaned, stirring from her sleep.

"Good morning... I hope the last two hours were full of pleasant sleep?" I greeted, looking at her over a picture of a woman with breasts the size of watermelons. Showing her the picture, I pointed them out and smirked. "Yours are better." Ah, the value of education. Gotta love it.

She took one look at what I was talking about and her face lit up like a piece of red glass in the desert sun. She didn't respond and when she tried to look away, vivid X-rated pictures aided her blush. Eventually, she learned that the only safe place to look was at the ceiling.

"Temari made breakfast..." I whispered, moving a tiny bit closer. Actually, I would have moved more but I could only move so far. And I was waiting for tonight to be on top of her.

Deserai got the hint and smiled. "So what would you like for breakfast?"

"Let's see what's left in the fridge. We'll need to go shopping for food and tonight anyway so we might as well... um..." I stopped talking. I didn't know what I was saying. My mind had been shut off but my mouth wouldn't shut up until I sounded like a complete idiot.

"Gaara... are you... asking me on a... a date?" she asked slowly.

I couldn't face her. I just looked at my wall to the left and nodded.

Suddenly, I was tackled off the bed and Deserai lay on top of me. She had hugged me and knocked the both of us to the ground. "I thought you'd never ask. I would love to go out with you, Gaara!"

If God had made me a fruit, I would have been an apple-- red delicious. Bright red. And oh-so-delicious. I was giving her my biggest smile that was coming straight from my heart. Okay, so it wasn't all that big but it was very warm... or as warm as my smiles could be. Which weren't as warm as others. Maybe I should just shut up before I become a bigger ass than I was before.

I hugged her back. 'Our first date... out first time together... everything has to be perfect!' I vowed to make this day and night one that both of us would never forget.

After breakfast, which had been ruined due to Kankuro begging Deserai to make him some real food, we headed our to do some dating activities. Unfortunately, the zoo decided to shut down any public access, the amusement park stopped running, and the park was so deserted that even the birds weren't there-- and all because of me. Everyone ran from the mere sight of me, children were dragged away by parents who had grown up knowing what I was, and even the damn animals wanted to stay the hell away!

But that soulful smile never left Deserai's face. She held onto my arm and placed her head on my shoulder. Her eyes closed softly as if to enjoy the moment and she let me lead her to where I wanted to go.

"Deserai?"

"Yes Gaara?" she asked, looking up. "What's wrong?"

I sighed. "Our date was supposed to be the best. But I ruined it and all because I was born with the Shukaku. I'm sorry." I couldn't face her. God knows, she was only looking so serene because she felt sorry for me. She wasn't one to get upset about not being able to go on a normal date. But I felt so bad about what was happeneing on our first date. It was supposed to be perfect.

"Gaara? Why do you think people go on dates?" Her voice was calm-- she was most definately expecting an answer. I finally looked at her and her blue eyes only confirmed what her voice had signified-- direct confrontation of the matter at hand.

"People go on dates so they can have fun being with eachother."

"Well, I don't know about you, but I think this date is a success."

"But everywhere we've tried to go has been closed or abandoned because of me."

"But we've been together the entire time. The location doesn't matter to me. I love you, not where we go. Or what we do," Deserai replied, laughing.

Before I could blush my embarrassment, I whispered, "You say that now... but just wait. We'll see how much what we do doesn't matter. I plan to make my room your favorite place, Deserai." I wrapped my arms around her.

"I don't think that'll work Gaara..." she replied slyly as she blushed at the images I hope she was seeing.

"Why not?"

"Because my favorite place will always be in your arms."

I stared down at the woman in my arms. Well, soon-to-be-woman. "You are always so sentimental..."

When she looked up at me in wonder, I continued, "That's what I love about you. You're the only woman I know who's like that. Even Temari isn't like you. It makes me wonder..."

"Wonder? About what, Gaara?"

"... what my mother was like. I've never know her. She died when I was born... because I was born. All I know is that she hated Suna and it's people. And that my name means "self-loving demon". So I wonder if she was like Temari... or like you... before she had me."

Deserai was in tears. "I-I think... I know she loved you... very m-much. Y-you are so kind... I can't imagine th-the pain you must have endured... but you ha-have done s-so well... I a-am so impressed...!" she cried softly, her head in her hands.

I should have been angry at myself for blurting something I'd never told anyone. But I wasn't. "You shouldn't fill your face with tears... what's done is done. You can't change that. Now kiss me. Make me feel loved..."

Deserai gave me a teary smile and cupped my cheek. Our faces got closer and closer... but it was all so slow, it made me want to kill God for making moments like these.

"HEY! GET AWAY FROM HER, YOU BASTARD!!"

Who saw that coming? Because I sure as Hell didn't!


	12. The Difference Between Men and Women

I know I've been away from Fanfiction for way too long... and the fact that I've got two and a half chapters that need to be put in is just a small hint. It's Des' turn to share her feelings and boy, does she know how to show them. Enjoy!!

Chapter 12: The Difference Between Men and Women

I shut my eyes. I knew that voice but I wish I didn't. Why couldn't he just go away!? I ran away from home to get away from him. Gaara let me stay with him so I wouldn't get taken back. And now there he was. In front of us with a few girls from the secret Gaara Fan Club. My brother Ritsu.

"Deserai... get over here. Now." Ritsu's voice was calm.

I just shook my head. Why would I want to leave? Gaara was the best thing that ever happened to me. I didn't want my brother. I didn't want my old life of lonely solitude. My three nights of the full moon at which the razor would allow my skin to bloom red flowers... Gaara would be there with me. And tonight... the second night of the full moon... Gaara will make my blood flow out of me without the use of a razor. Tonight, I will make Gaara part of my ritual. "You can't make me leave him alone!"

Ritsu's calm voice became cold. "He won't be alone. Suki, Gina, and Riku will take your place. He's a monster... he'll be happy with whatever he gets."

"But... I want him." Tears gathered but they didn't fall. "I want him. He wants me. the Shukaku is letting us be together. Why can't you see what is in your face? I can't make it any clearer for you! Leave us alone, Ritsu! I love him!!"

"But he can't love you! Gaara doesn't know what love is... your love can't be returned. You, sister, are alone, now more than ever."

"So I will be the embodiment of his love. My body, my mind... I am Gaara's love. I belong to him."

"He doesn't own you!"

"I gave myself to him!"

"Y-you... no! Why would you... You had--!?" Ritsu's face was shrwded in disgust and disbelief.

"NO!!" the three fangirls screamed in horror. their overly-mascaraed eyes were set in wide-eyed glare at the girl who had taken their Gaara away from them, a.k.a. me.

I giggled sinisterly and said, "Not yet. But it will happen."

Arms wrapped around my waist and Gaara's head rested on mine. "Don't worry. I'll take good care of your sister. You can keep those whores you were going to give me."

"Gaara-kun!!" the girls protested tearfully.

My brother looked more scared than angry so I could only imagine the look my love was giving him. I gently placed my arms over Gaara's. He was so cold... his skin was freezing despite the heat. I was surprised that the park we were in had grass, no matter how little. But nevertheless, I smiled and leaned back into his body. I wanted to warm him so badly. Even if it was my flesh against his. Which it will be. "Gaara... be nice to the girls. My brother is the one at fault," I said softly.I moved my head to look up at him and he kissed me upside down.

Suki screamed, Gina cried out in protest, and Riku fainted right on the spot. If Ritsu was going to do anything, it wasn't done. Whether he was too angry, shocked, or scared, I dont' know. I didn't care. Because Gaara's lips were the only warm part of his body. I wanted that warmth so badly. So I kissed him back to kick up the heat.

"Deserai! You're acting like a whore!!" Ritsu found his voice.

Before Gaara could Desert Coffin his stupid ass, I increased pressure on his arms. "Just because I am kissing Gaara without shame doesn't mean I am a whore: it means that I am in love. I love Gaara and I am going to be wtih him."

"Why?! Why him?! You couldn't have picked worse!"

"I could have picked Kankuro. But I'm selfish. I want Gaara. I give myself to him tonight. I'm his, not yours. You can't make me not be by his side. I will only die by his hand. I want you to kill me, Gaara... if you don't ever want me... or if Ritsu won't let us be together. Promise me?"

Gaara nodded. "I will be the only one who will have you. Your body will be my temple. You will only open to me. Promise me."

I nodded, a smile on my lips. "Of course. I am your temple... I am your love."

He kissed me again. So warm... his lips were soft and moist. I wanted them on my neck... on my breasts... on my stomach... on my-- is it hot in here or is it just me? I swear, with Gaara's lips on mine, it felt like it was 200 degrees! And getting hotter!!

I gave a soft moan as my lfet hand reached up to srap around his neck from behind. He still held me around the waist as his hands rubbed up and down my abs. His cold hands touched the warm flesh under my shirt and I moved closer to his chest to get away from his frigid touch. I guess I killed the moon when my moan became a squeal.

"What...?" he asked with uncertainty.

"Your hands are cold."

"... then warm them up."

I turned around and hugged his hands to my chest. Between my dark red tank top and the warmth of my hands, I'll bet his hands warmed up real quick. His face turned red, that's for sure. I giggled and moved our hans to my cheeks, where I pressed his against them. "Sorry about that..." I said cutely. He knew I did that on purpose.

"You're evil..." he shot.

"Remind me tonight..." I shot back.

"Count on it."

"Deserai... you can't stay with him. he's not your family. You are confused. You just think you love him," Ritsu said, his voice cool and poisonous.

I probably should have remained calm. That's who I was. i was the voice of reason amongst a fog of confusion. But even reasoning can be tossed out the window. Instinct took me over and I had to hit something. I had to do something to knock some sense into that thick head of my brother's So I threw a punch at him and my fist hit the side of his jaw so hard, his teeth cut my middle and ring knuckles. I guess my aim was a little off... I just clipped him. But I wanted to take him out with that one punch.

Lucky for the bastard, Gaara quickly grabbed me and carried me from Ritsu. "Deserai, calm down. He doesn't understand."

"And that gives him the right to tell me how I feel?! We're twins! Two separate people and different genders! It's not that he DOESN'T understand, it's that he CAN'T understand!" I shouted, still trying to get at the idiot.

Gaara nodded. "You are right..." he said, "... there is a difference between a man's love and a woman's love. Women show their love every day without hesitation. But men are different-- love can be used against us. We love in secret, away from our enemies. In times like these, though... I'm more afraid NOT to say "I love you"."

"Did you just... make a joke?"

"Yes... and no."

Ritsu asked skeptically, "That heartless monster can joke?"

"Yes. Just like I can love your sister and kill you without remorse," Gaara answered with a smirk.

I then got out of his grip and took his hand. "We should go. We still need to get supplies for tonight..."

"Too right..." Gaara's smirk widened. "Goodbye Ritsu. I'll see you again."

Together, we walked away from my idiot brother and the three sluts he'd tried to use to seduce Gaara.


	13. Agreements

Gaara's turn... and it's the second night of the full moon. Emotions run high... and Shukaku is ready for a romp in the hay... but to Gaara, this is more than just sex... this is love. Sorry that this chapter is so short but I couldn't think of a sex scene and yeah... there's one in the next chapter... that I've only got half written. It'll take a while... as it will probably be my longest chapter... and my most difficult. I can speak pervertedly, I can think pervertedly... I have problems writing a porn scene by myself. lol strange, eh? But I'm workin' on this little flaw of mine.

Chapter 13: Agreements

I hate grocery shopping. We stared at food for nearly 1 1/2 hours before we got everything we needed. Then came the fun shopping. I really liked that. So much better than groceries.

When Deserai and I got home, the moon was already peeking over the horizon. Night was faling. And Shukaku's heat was rising.

Earliler, when her brother confronted us in the park, she had gotten so angry at his ignorance. So angry that she had decked him and I found it difficult to hold her back. Looking at her face as she shouted at him, I found myself turned on. Her face was beautifully twisted in rage. Even shukaku could no longer rag on my choice of a "life mate" as it so bluntly put it. And for that... I thanked God.

She took the groceries and went into the kitchen to put them away. As she walked away, I noticed that feminine tilt in her hips. I hadn't seen that before. suddenly... everything about her seemed more feminine, sexier. Her shoulders were small, her waist was even smaller, her hips curved smoother. She looked like she had bloomed from a girl into a woman... in all ways but one.

Tossing the bag of "fun" into the closet, I hastily followed her into the kitchen. i needed to touch her "new body, familiarize myself with it.

Deserai was standing on her toes to reach the accursed shelft, giving me the opportunity to weave my arms around her waist and pull her into my chest.

She squeaked, dropping the box in her surprise. But she relaxed when she realized that it was only me. 'You wanna help me out?" Deserai asked, picking up the fallen cracker box.

My sand took it and put it in the cupboard with quick ease. Shukaku was getting anxious, the moon was turning blood red. The rising of the harvest moon-- a time when all demons felt the urges to mate with anyone closeby, to find sweet release betore the night was over.

"**It's tradition...**" the racoon said, excusing the slut-like actions of his fellow demon-kind.

'It doesn't repulse me this night... tomorrow, maybe. But by then... it will be too late for me to talk without making an ass of myself,' I thought to it.

Shukaku just chuckled. "**That's m'boy! Though I'd rather have Des's ass, if ya know what I mean!**"

'Of course. Actually, that's not a bad idea... one of your more brilliant one's, I'd say.'

"**You just complimented me... how strange. I think I like her influence on you even more now!**"

'Don't get used to it.'

"Gaara? Are you talking to Shukaku? I didn't know you could do that," Deserai asked, looking at me over her shoulder.

I gave her a kiss. "The harvest moon calls all demons, male or female, into heat. It and I are more intune at this time than any other time."

"Oh? Wow, I'm learning more and more about you two all the time!"

"Want to know something else?"

"What?"

"We both want you..." I whispered into her ear.

She blushed wildly. "O-oh... I knew Shukaku couldn't be so bad. Before... he was so cold and mean but... I thought that that was only a form of self-defense."

"It... is very bloodthirsty. And it will show no mercy when it comes time for us to mate."

"When?"

"Soon... less than an hour. Are you scared?"

"Yes... but not because of being with you. I'm afraid of the pain. I don't know if I can handle it without crying."

"But you cut yourself on purpose three nights a month."

"I haven't built up an immunity to accidental cutting or to pain caused by another."

I kissed her again. "You'll feel so good, the pain will not faze you. You'll be too busy moaning to the feeling of my entering your tight snatch and my thrusts will send you to heaven and back." That was my promise to her.

Deserai's face was the color of my hair. "Wow... those magazines really gave you quite a vocabulary, Gaara..."

"And I plan to do everything in vocabulary to you, Deserai."


	14. To Dance With a Demon In the Moonlight

1Sorry it's been so long! I've actually had this written up for quite a while now but I've been too busy with work and had too many people watching over my shoulder so I couldn't put up my lemony-goodness chapter! TT.TT please forgive me!! And assassins are not neccessary!

As always... I don't own Gaara... but I shall always love him!!

Chapter 14: To Dance With a Demon In the Moonlight

An hour later, I found myself on Gaara's bed. The full moon had taken it's toll on him. Our breathing had increased dramatically as we had spend the last hour "planning" our elopement. Though the last ten minutes was mainly reserved for kissing... and getting us overly excited and tingly for the perfect moment to "become one." But I would be lying if I said I wasn't afraid.

What if I became pregnant? I didn't know what would happen . The rumored pain alone was enough to make me quit right then and there.

'But... what about...?' I thought, looking into a shirtless Gaara's eyes. They were still that beautiful sea green color but they had the black design Shukaku's golden eyes possessed. The racoon was assisting my lover, telling him what to do instead of taking full control.

I couldn't tell him I wasn't ready. That would be cruel. I could take whatever pain he would dish out. Even if it was accidental. Blood... it would come out of me from a different place tonight... and Gaara/Shukaku would be my razor blade.

Kissing him, I slowly wrapped my arms around his waist, touching his flesh with my finger tips as I went. He was so warm... he was scorching hot. His skin was soft, flawless... I wanted to feel more of it. My clothes, which was basically my bra, panties, and pants; were too warm, suffocating me. "Gaara..." I whimpered, trying to control my urges.

"I told you... I wanted you and I intend to keep you, Deserai," he said, his and the demon's voices mixed together, both glazed with lust.

I moaned as his fingers roughly groped my breast through my bra. "Just take it off! This is torture!" I wasn't ordering... I was BEGGING.

A devilish smirk crossed his face. "Don't tell me what to do. There is a method to performing acts of seduction." Only Shukaku's voice was in that order. He didn't have to beg. It was clear– he was in charge. Or rather, the racoon was. But as it was inside Gaara, technically he was in charge.

"Shukaku... you are evil," I complained. Then I smirked. It was time for a pay-back attack.

Carefully, I trailed my hand to his groin and tenderly squeezed his groin through his boxers. And I continued touching him. "Was this part of your method?"

This time, it was his turn to groan. "And you call me evil? THIS is torture!"

"So do something about it, love..." I declared, not letting up.

He groaned in thought before that mischievous grin was back. "I'll give you what you want... but only because you will want more."

Then he cut my bra straps in two and began to kiss and nibble on my bare shoulders. Torture... part two. His lips were moist and softer than the skin on his waist. "Gaara..."

"See? Now you want more. The only question is... how should I torment you with your desire?"

"Could you maybe NOT torment me? I don't know how long I can go before the torture you place upon me is too much. Then I won't be able to keep quiet. And I might wake Temari up." That was a warning/threat that the longer they "play," the more opportunity there would be for her to cry out in loud ecstacy and wake everyone up.

He groaned. "You just took all the fun out of this..."

I licked my lips nervously. "Perhaps I could make it up to you?" I began to pull down his boxers suggestively.

"You... you want to...–"

"Such you off... that's right. Do you have any objections?" I pulled his boxers completely down. Then... I looked down. 'Damn! He's fucking HUGE! Will all THAT be able to FIT inside me?!" she asked herself. Now she felt more afraid than ever!

Gaara chuckled. "What's the matter? Can't handle me?" he asked teasingly.

I snapped out of it. Glaring at him in defiance, I said the first thing that came to mind– "What the Hell did you eat to get so big?!"

He just looked at me. A blank expression was all over his face. I wonder... was it something I said? I mean, sure it was a stupid question... but he wasn't even laughing at me? It would have been better than just staring at me like I'm an idiot... which I kinda am... but STILL!

"Sorry... didn't mean to say something stupid... well... would you say something?!"

Gaara chuckled but not a word escaped his mouth.

'Okay... so he's laughing at me. Guess that kinda counts as saying something...' I thought with a sigh.'But it still hurts a bit... guess I'll let it slide this once since I am acting pretty foolish.'

"If you're going to say something, don't apologize after you said what you meant. Then I won't make you nervous by just staring at you." He spoke at long last.

"So why didn't you just answer if you knew all that?"

"Honestly? I like it when you panic."

"Oh really?" I smirked at him in challenge.

"Yes. Was there any doubt?"

Actions speak louder than words. I bent down and took him in my mouth, my tongue sliding over his pulsing veins under his member.

Looking up, I smirked evilly. His eyes were shut. His lips were twitching to stop all noise from leaking out. A blush glazed over his cheeks. "You like that?" I asked, blowing cool air on his wet member.

He growled. "Yes... so why'd you stop?"

"You may be evil but I can dish it out too." I took him back inside my mouth and began to bob my head up and down. His long thick dick went down my through. Moaning, my through had vibrated his member. He tasted so good!

This caused his growl to turn into a groan of lust and wanton. "You've never done this before?"

"Never. I've never had a boyfriend and everyone had reserved my rape for when Shukaku escaped from your consciousness. Guess you could say I was ready for this... except you're here... and it's not rape," I said, removing my lips from a round his dick.

Gaara nodded. "Lay down... I am thirst and want a taste."

"Huh?"

Gaara chuckled. "Lay down."

I did what he told me to do.

"Remove your pants and underwear. Slowly."

He looked at me with a look of slight warning. He didn't want me to "play evil."

"May I stand up to take them off?" I asked. "It'll be easier that way." I figured that I could give him a less complicated strip tease– a simple thoughtful gesture, right?

Gaara shook his head. "I don't find "easy" ways to be better..." That... and I bet he wants to see me struggle a bit.

I smiled. "Kiss me?"

"After my drink..."

Giggling, I started removing my pants. When laying down, it really wasn't so hard. My hips had been raised and put down over and over again. My legs reached up and the chilled desert air kissed my skin as I slid the pant legs down my tingling limbs. And my beloved was watching me with lust in his very aura.

Finally, I lay naked on the blood red sheets, my dark locks spread out around my head like an angel's halo. Unfortunately, I was also scared out of my mind. What if my body displeased him? What if I looked even worse now compared to when I was clothed? My heart thumped against my rib cage. His burning gaze scorched my body as he looked at me. Doubt flooded my heart. So many things could be wrong with me and I might just be too blind to see them.

"Beautiful..."

My eyes widened and I stared into his framed seafoam orbs. Both Gaara's and Shukaku's voice was there. They had called me beautiful. And then... his head began to lower to my– "Oh God!"

It was horrible! His tongue slipped out and around my folds. It slid inside my love tunnel and rasped against my inner walls. He nipped at my button with his sensuous lips. It was awfully horrible... and extremely wonderful. A torturous ritual that left me in agonizing pleasure.

At some point shortly after, I must have had a time lapse. One second, we were kissing each other, tasting out own fluids on our tongues. And then... he was inside me, stretching me and sending me into ecstacy at the same time!

I had heard so many horror stories about "the first time." The pain, the risk of walking funny the next morning, the chance of pregnancy... I had gotten past the pain, I wouldn't want to irritate my reddened pussy so I would walk a little, and... I wanted to have Gaara's child. I longed for a small red-headed god/goddess that came from our jointed union.

"Gaara! I LOVE YOU!!" I cried out, pushing out lower bodies together.

He moved his lips to my neck and bit into my neck. Obviously, Shukaku had come out to play at some point in time, during out lovemaking, and with his sharpened fangs, had marked me.

Sweet release came to both of us and our fluids mixed. Some of our essence leaked out of me and dripped onto the bloodstained red sheets. We were now one.

"Deserai..."

"Gaara..."

Darkness flooded my vision... and his whispered, "I love you..." He had a loving smile on his face. That was the last thing I heard and saw.

((that was my lemon... first and only one completed all on my own. So... WHAT DID YOU THINK!! PLEASE RATE AND CONTACT ME WITH YOUR THOUGHTS!!))


	15. Living Happily Ever After

1Final Chapter!! Longest story I've made yet!! And I am now done bragging... this chapter is short but sweet... I hope you enjoy and once again, I don't own Gaara... and I don't want anyone sending ninja assassins to kick my ass!

Chapter 15: Living Happily Ever After

Deserai had passed out blissfully, but I was still rearing to go. I didn't go to sleep. Shukaku wouldn't be able to get his turn with my Deserai if I didn't give into that urge. She was mine! I may sound like some possessive, overbearing jerk but that's just how much I cared for her. No one has ever stayed by my side for so long.

Yashamaru was the only exception. But in the end, even he hated me. During that time, he had coddled me and my defenses had been brought way down. And then he tried to kill me.

My siblings didn't count. They were stuck with me. Temari cared about me out of fear for her life. Kankuro hated me but went along with whatever I said. Even after all this time... fear was still enlaced in their eyes.

But Deserai... oh, my sweet Deserai... after less than two days, she has let me touch her, taste her, and even consume her blood. Everyone feared my blood lust... and she seemed enchanted by it.

Now I want to take her again... and again... and AGAIN! But it was time that I exercise self-control in my blood lust. Actually, in lust-period.

Though I really did want her.. I could wait. Using Shukaku's instincts, Deserai was marked. She was mine... forever. Perhaps this is what they mean by 'happily ever after'? At least... in my book it is.

That's all... so I shall also include no car bombs, anthrax via mail, or mafia thugs at my doorstep or in my car... no flames for that last comment though, because I'm not being insensitive to anyone's feelings on terrorism or whatever. I was merely covering the basics.


End file.
